The weekends almost over. And I can say honestly I think this is going to get harder befor it gets better.

Went shopping today with alittle bit extra money and wanna know what I baught for myself  our family?

Steak
Smoothie mixes

Yep thats right. Ok soooo Maybe I got a small pack of pringles BBQ flavor. But I got a one for hubby also.

Not saying there wasnt plently of things that I wanted to get. Because lets be honest. I could go splurge with all the junk food at this place. But when it comes down to it. I just dont really want it.

How sad is that?

So maybe this wont be that hard. I know that maybe its because right now its my choice. And after the surgury it will be something I HAVE to do , To be able to have a good outcome. I think when its something you are forced to do for what ever reason . Thats when its the hardest.

OMG..... today was one weird day.

Started off pouring and me being me... Having planed all my running around for this morning since hubby was going to be home early to let me go to my apt.

I went for my 2nd of 3 weigh ins. And when I walked in I thought I was in the wrong place, Because everything was boxed up.Turns out their moving to another location within the week. But got weighted by one of the desk ladys and her daughter. Yea that wasnt werid at all. But seems Ive gained 5 Lbs since the last time I got weighed(Last Week) But after a week of 3 meals of chinese . Wendys . Junk food out the butt. It only makes sence that it would happen that way. It is good that you can get in and out within 5 mins.

I need to call one of the ladys to talk to her about blood work and all the extra little test I'm going to need , Like a MRI and so on. And update her and all the apts and see how everythings coming along with getting insurance approval.

Also today , I had another apt. With the Dietitian. Once again I was not alone in this apt. The lady had a student with her. Yes this hospital network is a learning one. One reason I will never take my son to this hospital network. But thats a whole other story. The meeting went good. I learned ALOT of things and she liked that I knew most of the stuff and had already started to taking the first few steps. Like the 30/60 rule. Nothing to drink 30 mins befor or 60 after you eat. This is one of the hardest so I thought I would start to train my body now. And I wont be able to eat bites bigger then my pinkie nail. Thats the next thing Im going to start to train my body with.

I did find out Im going to have to start looking into which type of Vitamines Ill have to start taking. The lady gave me a few options but said it was up to me in the long run. And this will be a long run because I want to get heathly and have more beautiful babies.

So if anyone actually reads this weird blog about the Journey trew Gastric Bypass surgury. Can you let me know which type of vitamines you prefer and why? Any help is good help.

Ive been thinking. Along with posting my weight each time I post. That maybe . Just maybe I might post a weekly or bi weekly photo of myself. Still not sure about this yet. I know there will be photos but not sure how often.

Think next post will be explaing why I want this surgury. Maybe it might turn into be a good read. maybe not. Either way . It will be honest

Good night all

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Wow... Can we just say I never thought I would actually make this blog?

I mean to be so public about such a private family matter is such a huge jump for me.

This is me. A 24 year old woman, Wife to the man I cant imagine my life without,  Mother to one of the most beautiful , outgoing ,Thill seeking, loveable little autistic boys I would be lost without. Daughter to a wounderful momma and dad. And many other things.

 And yet . Here I am. A massivly obese woman that plainly.. Is scared to death of this. I know that if this dosnt change I will be killed because of this weight. And yet. I cant seem to stop thinking about food.

 I mean here I sit after just working a 8 hour night. And on my way home I went to wendys. Why cant I stop? What is it about this thing called food that I cant seem to get straight? Well thats why Im doing this. With me starting this blog I think it will give me an out other eating. To maybe just maybe get a support group other then those around me outside of the computer.

I have only told my bestfriends and family. To me that is all that needs to know. No one but my boss knows at work. And trust me I suck at keeping secrets. To me it kinda seems like I failed. But I can honestly say Ive tried everything to lose this weight. Nothing is working and it seems to only be getting worse.

So here I am on day 1 of this blog. I dont know if any of my family or friends will read this sooner or later but here I am. Take it or leave it.

Back in mid nov of last year I started the porcess of getting surgery. I have picked my Dr. Met most of the staff and found out everything I need to do to get approval from my insurance company. From what I know I have made all of the apts I need and have the support of my family dr. Tomorrow I go in for the first of many dr. Apts . The dietian(sp?) . And going in for my 2nd outta 3 weigh ins befor work. Not looking forward to either to tell the truth. But I will do what ever I have to for this.

I am making myself, This blog, And everyone that reads it that I will keep everyone up to date and let everyone into my mind trew this process. Cant always promise it will make sense but it will be real. Another promise is I will track my weight on here. Think this is something more scarry to me then skydiving. And Man oh man I will never be caught dead skydiving.

So here I go. Putting on my big girl underoos and gonna end this one off with ................

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